Love, as a Character: Explained

To be able to understand the bond between Kamiki and Sabin in order to reproduce them in any form of media, it’s important to not misinterpret the nature of Sabin’s transformation. When he was possessed by the Anju, for a measure of time, he existed as a sort of split-personality, his human side clashing with this intruder that had bonded to his dying soul- Sabin and the Anju would alternately ‘overtake’ the other, the human desperate to not be controlled, and the Anju bitter and intense at being trapped. However, after a measure of time, the two found that they couldn’t live this way, and began to grow together, and understand each other more- first, they called a sort of a… ‘truce’, and then, each took on characteristics of the other. Finally, the Anju and Sabin became a whole entity, after a long, winding road studded in complications and much self-discovery. I’ve taken the time to re-outline this because there are those people who still think of Sabin as being possessed by an Anju, rather than ‘half’ Anju, and when they describe the love between Sabin and Kamiki, they tend to exclude the Anju, or they write/draw it as if she’s in love with Sabin, despite what he is. When in reality, she’s in love with the entirety of his existence- and it makes for a perfect, extremely rare union.

Kamiki never knew Sabin before his possession, and so, is only able to love him in the context of ‘them’. She doesn’t entirely trust the Anju aspect of him, and it can frighten her, but she still loves it, and it her- and she does trust the human aspect, which is what it requires. (In a way, Kamiki and Sabin are two walled people who’ve thrown out all abandonment and existed together in a vulnerable place.)

Kamiki is a good person- she strives to do the right thing in all manner of endeavor, and is trusting and generous to a fault. So, in a way, it’s freeing, to let herself be loved by something dark- it completes her, balances her. Kamiki’s greatest fear… is that she’ll live an unsatisfying life, without touching the lives of others, or be loved for who she is. If it was unbound, an Anju would be true to its nature, and feed off this, her greatest fear. However, the Anju that is Sabin…loves her, and has already had its life changed and touched by her existence, and her love. So it cannot feed off of her fear- because it makes her fear… impossible. In essence, it is the greatest force in dispelling this fear- existing in the shadow of the Anju’s love; Kamiki is protected unlike any other. Her greatest fear is made impossible… by fear itself. The Anju has also helped to give her a son, which is another guarantee that she will always mean something to someone, and that her life has meaning, again making her greatest fear impossible.

Their relationship is so riddled with paradoxes that it cannot exist entirely on a fathomable, human plane- the breadth of its force, its spirit, draws Kamiki in, as her soul is bound in the power of spirit. Because of the unique nature of her powers, Kamiki understands, perhaps better than anyone ever could, what this relationship means.

The Anju has fears: being trapped, being controlled, and becoming human… ‘losing’. It didn’t used to be afraid, unbound- but existing as and with Sabin, it’s changed, and become more human as they’ve blended. But even in this wake of newborn emotions, the Anju still craves fear… so in a way, it has no choice but to drench itself in those choices that will make him the most afraid- including being more human- so that fear can continue to exist. So it goes on loving Kamiki, more every day, vulnerable and confused, in a way, and then it is nourished and sustained by the realization of its fears. And for that fear existing… it becomes all the more human, beginning the cycle again, ‘trapped’ in loving her with all it’s become, because it couldn’t possibly stop. Many seem to portray Kamiki and the “human Sabin” as being in love, with the Anju lording over them, terrorizing what is a quiet, loving moment- but really, the Anju loves her as much as the part that makes Sabin human- and it couldn’t leave her…without being heartbroken, and becoming all the more ‘human’ for the pain of the loss.